Back to it.

Back to work...back to school. Was hard to get back into the groove this week. Two weeks is a long break and it feels like we have all struggled to get up in the mornings. Well, it doesn't just feel that way...it has been that way. The kids at the preschool are also a little slow getting into the swing of things. Progress was helped by the weather that has been very spring-like; warm and sunny with blossoms bursting out all over Vancouver streets.

River was very happy to get back his aide. She has been with him for over a year and left to pursue a different position last term. River was very upset. Consistency and routine is very important to him and this is a major factor in how he deals with the anxiety of school life. The school has not been very forthcoming with information and it is very frustrating to be the last to know about these things...not to mention having little or no input in the decisions about who works with your child (their experience, training etc). So we were not sure when he got to school who would be there. But S. was back and I could see that he was very happy and has had a good week. For how long she is back, we don't know.

I have arranged a meeting with the principal next week to talk about some kind of empathy program in River's class and in the school. There have been a few instances of (for want of a better word) bullying and poking fun. River does  not seem to be aware of the instances of poking fun; things like kids running away from him when he wants to play with him. He will simply be unsure of why they run away from him laughing. As well, he is does not understand why a kid hits him or kicks him. So much so that he will continue to want to be that child's friend because, for whatever reason, he has taken a liking to the child. He will just wonder why they hurt him. If he is told that they are being mean, he will repeat that they are mean, but without seeming to have any real understanding of what their behaviour actually means. In school the onus seems to be on River to choose better friends...even though this is difficult for him. But the fact is that some of his peers are lacking in some crucial empathy skills. Inclusion should come hand in hand with demystification and raising awareness of what makes kids different. Instead, I feel like schools simply incorporate kids with disabilities with little or no discussion or information. They are the elephant in the room; everyone knows they are different...but everyone pretends not to notice. Except some of these kids have not even learned feigned unawareness, or anything else. They have learned that it is easy to be overtly mean to a kid that is less able to fight back. I am beginning to wonder if we can actually teach empathy to kids, or whether they learn through observing how adults behave, and talk; as well as through reading comprehension (which requires empathy with characters and their situations). Is this happening...or happening enough?